We have to consider the real victim of this Michael Jackson trial: Marty McFly. He’s having trouble adjusting to the year 2005….
(Hill Valley, 2005. At the arcade, Marty’s attempts to order a Tab and a Pepsi Free have not gone well.)
Marty Look, just give me something without any sugar in it, OK?
(The man puts a large box of Splenda in front of Marty. Elsewhere, Marty hears a video game. He walks over. A young kid approaches him.)
Marty Hey, do you have Wild Gunman?
Kid Wild What-man? I only do Dance Dance Revolution.
Marty You mean I have to use my feet? That’s like exercise!
(Marty begins to play Dance Dance Revolution. At first he is unsuccessful, but then steadies himself and begins to moonwalk, tug at his crotch, shamon, etc. He wins the round.)
Marty What do you think, kid? Just like Michael Jackson.
Kid Michael Jackson?! Ew, pervert!
Parent You keep your Michael Jackson-loving keister away from my son!
(Marty runs away.)
(Doc is wearing a flannel shirt and sports a soul patch.)
Doc Marty, you’ve got to come back with me! All the way back to the year 1995!
Marty But, Doc—!
Doc First put on this bee suit! All kids dress like tap dancing bumblebees in the year 1995!
Away they go, ready to repeat the exact same dialogue in yet another time period. And we love them for it.