The Whole Jew Thing

I know, I know; truth is stranger than fiction, but I sure wish truth would stop swiping my ideas.

I was going to do a follow-up to my “What type of Jew are you?” fake quiz and base it on David Bowie. My David Bowie type would be “Serious Moonlight tour David Bowie: You sold out!” However, I was unable to find a photograph from that tour; no big-sunglassed, bleach-blonde Bowie for me.

Recently, to promote a new album, Bowie released a television commercial in which the Modern Lover encounters many of his former incarnations. Ziggy Stardust! Aladdin Sane! Major Tom! All the young dudes! Unfortunately, this made my second attempt at ridiculing Internet quizzes redundant.

And I didn’t even see Serious Moonlight-era Bowie in this advertisement. Do Diamond Dogs trump Cat People?

Then wackiness ensues at The New Republic magazine when Greg Easterbrook says “Recent European history alone ought to cause Jewish executives [like Miramax’s Harvey Weinstein] to experience second thoughts about glorifying the killing of the helpless as a fun lifestyle choice.” He also accuses Weinstein of valuing money above all else. All well and good, (except for the whole Jew thing) but I wanted to be the one to chastize Weinstein—for something he didn’t even do in a planned play!

Hmmm, both my quiz and Weinstein-bashing come awfully close to anti-Semitism. Maybe it’s better that people steal those ideas from me.

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