At Panera

Friday evening at Panera….

Mike OK, tell me if this gag for one of my plays is funny.

Teresa Sure.

Mike OK, you know the Rocky statue at the Philadelphia Museum of Art?

Teresa No.

Mike OK, you know how in Rocky he runs up the steps of the museum?

Teresa I never saw Rocky.

Mike Oh. Well he does, so in real life they made a bronze statue of that.

Teresa Oh.

Mike So what I’m wondering is—since Philadelphia gets bombed in this play—if it’s funny to show the Rocky statue like the Statue of Liberty in Planet of the Apes, you know?

Teresa I never saw Planet of the Apes.

Mike OK. In Planet of the Apes…. Should I tell you the ending?

Teresa Sure, I’m never going to see it, anyway.

Mike OK. At the end of Planet of the Apes, he finds the Statue of Liberty, and it’s been blown up, so you only see the arm and the head sticking out of the sand.

Teresa (Gasps:) Oh no! They blow up the Statue of Liberty?

Mike Yes.

Teresa Why do the apes blow it up?

Mike No, it wasn’t the apes; it was people way back when.

Teresa Damn yo, no one’s going to want to watch a movie where the Statue of Liberty gets blown up.

Mike No, it was blown up thousands of years ago.

Teresa Still, that’s not cool.

Mike That’s not the point. What I’m asking is, if we see the Rocky statue with its arm and head sticking out of the sand like the Statue of Liberty in Planet of the Apes, and the guy who sees it reacts like Charlton Heston, is it funny?

Teresa I guess. I don’t know. I guess it’s funny to people who’ve seen Planet of the Apes.

Mike OK.

Teresa And Rocky.

Mike Thank you.

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